


Never Come Here Again

by teddybeardoctorr



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Minor Character Death, Minor Violence, Other, POV Dean Winchester, Recreational Drug Use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-30
Updated: 2019-03-30
Packaged: 2019-12-26 13:35:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18283337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teddybeardoctorr/pseuds/teddybeardoctorr
Summary: About the family Dean Winchester left behind.





	Never Come Here Again

There are a lot of things that have happened to me.

I didn't think this would be one of them.

We were walking up to the house when Sam stopped me, placing a hand on my chest. “And you really think she's gonna talk?”

“She has no other family,” I replied, raising my hands in defense. “No one to take her in. That thing that killed Sara could still be after her.”

He pursued his lips and looked away. Sam knew how I felt about this whole situation. These past two days, he was walking on eggshells around me.

I lowered my hands, stuffing them in my dress pants pockets. “Sam, just...let's do this for her, okay?”

He nodded once before following my lead to the front door.

We had a lot going on, but when I heard that Sara was mauled by a werewolf, I knew I had to get to the bottom of it.

No other hunters knew what happened, besides that she was hunting a pack of werewolves. Sara was known for taking out packs alone. It's what initially attracted me when I met her. So, to get killed like this, at 40...it just didn't seem right.

Swallowing hard, I rang the doorbell twice in a row. I didn't know if Veronica, her only daughter, would be home, but I thought we'd start here first before anywhere else.

I was about to press the doorbell a third time before the door started to open.

Staring back at me was a shorter girl. Eyes red, hair pulled up.

“Can I help you?” she asked, clearing out her eyes with one hand.

I stood there, frozen.

Luckily, Sam waved once and started retrieving his badge, alerting me to do the same.

“Hi, I'm Agent Manning. This is my partner, Agent Chamberlain. We're with the FBI and wanted to ask a few questions regarding Sara Navarro.”

She looked at him, then at me. Skeptical.

“You're Sam and Dean Winchester.”

I knitted my eyebrows, now confused. “How do you-”

“Well, you two are legends,” she replied, grinning and stepping aside for us to come in. “I just never thought I'd get to see you two myself.”

Once we stepped in, she closed and locked the door behind her. Sam cleared his throat. He was never a fan of the smell of weed.

“So, you're a hunter?” Sam asked slowly.

She nodded, crossing her arms. “My mom started me up when I was 14. She wanted me to know what was out there and how to protect myself.”

Briefly, Sam and I shared a look. I wouldn't imagine raising anyone in this hell of a life, but I understood the precaution.

Walking into the living room, she plopped down on the recliner and relit her joint. We sat on the couch and studied her.

Dark and straight hair. Pale skin. She definitely resembled Sara.

It made me grin a little.

After taking a drag, she blew the smoke away and said, “I'm Veronica.”

“So, you were expecting us?” I asked.

“Me and mom had papers written up. An unofficial will of what we wanted to happen if one of us got hurt on the job.”

I nodded, remembering this detail.

Picking up on my silence, Sam asked, “Could you tell us anything about what happened to your mom? We're not just here to help. We want to help.”

Letting his words sink, she put out her blunt out on the ashtray, placing it on the coffee table. She sat there and looked at it for a long moment after she settled in.

Clearing her throat, she explained, “Me and her were never here much, as you can tell. Once I graduated high school, we hit the road a lot. But lately, I haven't been wanting to hunt. So, she took this job on her own since it was just a state away….I-I-I should've-”

Not continuing her sentence, Sam leaned forward and nodded. This made her take a deep breath, continuing. “It just doesn't make sense. My mom is one of the best hunters I know. She would never get killed by a pack.”

“That's what we are trying to get to the bottom of,” I stated, placing my elbows on my knees.

“Did she have any enemies?” Sam asked.

“No. She never really got into it with anyone.”

“Did she say anything to you that night?”

She shook her head. “I mean...she just said she really, really loved me and would see me soon. But she always does - I mean, did.”

I felt my throat get drier, my shoulders get tenser. “And was that normal for her?”

The recognition on her face told me the truth.

“I guess not. Not like that.”

Sam and I exchanged a look. Knowing this was exactly where this road would head to.

Looking back at Veronica, I cleared my throat and asked. “Did your mom tell you anything about your family before she died?”

“It's always just been us. I have an uncle, but we aren't close at all.”

“What about your father?” Sam asked, clasping his hand together. “Is he still around?”

She swallowed hard before laughing, her tone flat. “She said he died before I was born. Suicide. She didn't have anything nice to say about him.”

I nodded. Sounded about right.

“I truly, truly, don't have anyone,” she added, eyes shined with tears waiting to spill. “My world is gone. I’m not sure what the point is of figuring any of this out, if it won’t bring her back.”

The silence that cut through all of us made me feel like Sara was still around.

Wondering why the hell I was anywhere near here.

None of this was settling the way I wanted it to. I tried remaining stoic, like I was handling a case. But I didn't know how long I could hold up the act.

How was I supposed to tell Veronica that I was her dad?

 

***

 

_2000_

 

 

_It was 2am. She was fast asleep._

_If I left now, I could probably be unseen and unheard._

_Carefully lifting her arm from around me, I slowly got up from bed. I cringed when she shifted, but she was still fast asleep._

_Dad was going to wonder why I wasn't back at the motel room by now, when all I needed to do was investigate our current case. I needed to get back before he woke up and yelled at me, even though I was 21-years-old._

_Zipping up my jeans, I felt something in my nose tickle._

_I pressed down on one side, trying to suppress it._

_And then I heeled over, sneezing anyway._

“ _Crap!” I whispered._

_Sara sat up from her bed slowly, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. Once she took me in, she knitted her eyebrows. “What are you doing?”_

“ _Just putting on my clothes,” I replied. “I was getting cold.”_

_She crossed her arms, fully sitting up now._

“ _You're lying.”_

_Raising my hand in confusion, I began, “Why would you think-”_

“ _You never wear anything when we sleep together, Dean.”_

_Oh._

_I tried coming up with a lie, but I couldn't fool her. My hand dropped, along with my eyes from hers._

_She sighed, and I could still feel her glare searing into my skin._

“ _Why can't you ever tell me the truth?”_

_I looked up, tilting my head back. Still not being able to speak._

_To avoid her noticing my shaky hands, I looked away, searching for the rest of my clothes. Able to slip on my shirt and flannel._

“ _So, you're just not gonna say anything.”_

_Pursing my lips from saying something I'd regret, I sat on the edge of the bed and slipped my boots on quickly._

“ _You're a coward."_

_Turning around, my finger pointed at her. She inched backward, flinching._

_Seeing the look of confusion and fear in her eyes wounded me. I never meant to hurt her, but that's just how it had to be._

_If she didn't talk so much, this would've been easier._

“ _You don't know anything about me,” I said slowly._

“ _Because you never tell me the truth.”_

_My hand fell down, giving up. What was I supposed to tell her? Another lie?_

_Getting up, I grabbed my leather jacket from the floor, slinging it on. Popping the collar. Straightening out, anything to avoid her._

_But she wouldn't make that easy._

_She got out of bed, and stood in front of me. Blocking my exit from her bedroom and out of her apartment. Causing me to roll my eyes and throw up my arms._

“ _You're not going anywhere until you tell me one honest thing,” she commanded._

“ _Or what?”_

“ _Or you'll never leave.”_

“ _Wow. What a threat.”_

“ _Dean,” she practically growled. “You are acting like a teenager. Please just tell me what's wrong.”_

“ _What's wrong is I have to go. Now, if you would just-”_

_Placing a hand up, stopping me from pulling her away from the door, she shook her head. “Don't touch me.”_

“ _God, why are you acting like a little girl?” I yelled, feeling red crawl up my neck._

_The look on her face made me widen my eyes, knit my eyebrows. I couldn't even describe it. Maybe anger, hate...disappointment?_

“ _Well first, I'm a woman. Second, I'm not any other hook up. We are dating, Dean. You got me pregnant. You don't get to decide to just leave like some kind of deadbeat.”_

_While she spoke low, every word dripping with anger, the tear streaming down her cheek failed her. Deep down, it made want to let go._

_But I knew I had to._

_I nodded once, not meeting her gaze again after that. “I'm sorry to disappoint.”_

_This same scenario has played out before, but in different ways. I would always leave and come back, depending where the job took us. That she understood. I would leave in the middle of the night, not knowing if I'd come back. That was something she didn't understand._

_This time, I wasn't coming back._

_Right now, I couldn't be a father._

_Not right now. Not ever, probably._

_I don't think she would ever understand that._

_And no one could know about this. Maybe if I wasn't here, not many would._

_Shaking her head slowly and crossing her arms, she stepped aside, waiting for me to leave._

_After waiting a few beats for my feet to propel me forward, she said, “If you walk out that door and throw these three months away, I hate you. You are nothing to me. And you will never, ever have a part in our child's life. I'll tell them you killed yourself, because you're a coward, Dean Winchester.”_

_My hand formed into a fist, wanting to punch the wall. Punch myself. Punch anything that would make my knuckles bleed._

_If only she truly understood._

_But instead, I let my fingers fall loose, and I left her apartment for the last time._

 

_***_

 

_2005_

 

 

_My ears perked up, listening. Waiting._

_I lost my flashlight. It was dark in these woods. But luckily, I've been in this position many times. I could walk in the dark in my sleep._

_They were waiting for me. I smirked, machete poised in front._

“ _I know you can smell me, son of a bitch!” I yelled. “Come and eat me!”_

_Still, nothing._

_Scrunching my nose, I tried ignoring the smell of my sweat. It was getting warmer, and honestly, I smelled disgusting. Running in the woods all night would do that._

_And then I heard the crunch of a few twigs, turning around and slashing forward._

_First, it was just one. I easily behead them. Watched their head roll to the ground. Wiped the blood off my cheek. Done._

_Then, there was another one. Sliced. Blood splattering across my shirt. And one that tried grabbing my shoulder to bring me to their chest so they could feast. Fortunately I turned around, punched them in the gut, and took them out._

_But there was more. Four more, at least, and then five. Six._

_A whole pack of vampires coming after me._

_I gulped, but pushed down the feeling of fear. Fear kept me awake. Alive. If I died, at least it was fighting to the death._

_Hearing another set of footsteps, I clenched my jaw and continued fighting. Seven now. If they wanted it, they could come and get it._

_Slicing forward. One, two, three heads down. Getting punched, but being a step ahead and ducking next time, catching them off guard. Getting knocked to the ground. Gathering my bearings. Slicing from up top, on the ground, dirt digging into my heels. Hands on my throat. Machete pushing forward to finish them off. Blood soaking me completely._

_I thought I would lose count of how many times I sliced, but it was less than I expected._

_And the one who knocked me to my knees when I gathered myself and grabbed my shoulders, fingers digging in, his head fell to the ground. Not because of me._

_Catching my breath, I slowly got up on my feet again. I turned around, clenching my fists, and widened my eyes._

“ _Looks like I came just in time.”_

_I laughed pathetically. What a small world._

_Wiping the sweat off my brow with the back of my hand, I picked up my machete, wiped the excess blood on my jeans, and started walking away._

“ _You're welcome,” she said, catching up to me._

_I stopped in my tracks. Closed my eyes. She already had me here. Mind as well walk out of here safely._

_I turned to her, taking her in. Shorter hair than before, but still thick and dark. Blood splattered on her face. Eyes so, so dark. A scratch along her cheekbone. She was thicker, but it fell in all the right places. At least to me. She was beautiful; no denying that._

“ _You miss me?” I asked._

_She snorted, rolling her eyes. “Something like that.”_

_Shrugging my shoulders, I continued, “I thought you said you wanted to stop hunting. Start your family.”_

_She swallowed hard, her lips shut tightly. I could tell I said the wrong thing, but I didn't care. After all, I was nothing to her._

“ _The family you walked out on? Yeah, well, I'm trying to keep them safe.”_

“ _Them?”_

“ _Why would you care?”_

_Giving in, I dropped my eyes from hers. Piercing mine with judgement and accusation. There was nothing I could say to that._

_I shouldn't care. I shouldn't still be here._

_But another version of me roamed the Earth. I didn't even know their gender, name, age. Who they looked like more._

_Leaving her in that apartment 5 years ago was stupid._

“ _Look,” I said, waiting for her to interrupt. But she didn't. She still stared; questioning, waiting. “I was 21. I was immature. I wasn't ready to be a father. I didn't think...I didn't think I was a good fit. I-”_

“ _Neither did I, Dean!” she said, voice hoarse. “We are hunters! We don't get a happy ending. We don't get the option of a normal life. But you know what you do when you bring another life into this world? You suck it up. You keep going. You raise them better than you were raised. You get brave. You don't just walk away when it's convenient.”_

“ _You think what I did was convenient?” I asked, disgusted._

“ _For you? Yes. Because you're Dean. A douche who only cares about sex, beer, and strippers. And once you get what you want, you leave. It's what you do. And don't try and tell me you've changed, because you haven't. Not one, fucking, bit.”_

_Her chest raising up and down, I wasn't too sure which words to take away from this. Were we raised wrong? Are happy endings even real?_

_Guess I never thought about it that long, or deep. I never had to._

_Shaking my head with those questions, she spoke before I could, “Just go, Dean. Go now. I saved your ass, and that's more than you ever deserved.”_

_Her feet unmoving, eyes stabbing into mine, I took it as my cue to leave._

_Only this time, when I walked away from her, I had the feeling in my gut that I shouldn't._

 

_***_

 

_2009_

 

 

_I come back from the dead, and all I could think about was Sam hiding the obvious from me._

_Still keeping me in the dark. Still treating me like I was a moron._

_I knew he was drinking demon blood, and now more than ever, the words my father told me before he died rang loud as all hell in my ears._

_If Sammy wasn't family, he would be something I'd kill, cause I had no idea who he was anymore._

_Waking up in the middle of the night to an empty bed beside me made me worried, pissed, terrified. Mostly pissed off, because I couldn't even drive Baby and take my mind off of all this. Off of what my life had become._

_Sitting up and grabbing my cell from the nightstand, I flipped it open and dialed Bobby's number._

_After a few rings, he asked, “You alone?”_

_I swallowed hard and nodded. “Yeah. He's gone.”_

“ _Good” He started, yawning. Bobby was probably up for awhile, reading up on any way we could prevent the last few seals from opening. “Now you can open the envelope.”_

“ _Why did I have to wait for you to give me the okay?” I asked, annoyed._

“ _Because you're going to want to be alone when you open it, idjit,” he bit back._

_I rolled my eyes, sighing and standing up. “Alright. Found anything, yet?”_

_But he hung up, leaving me in the dark. Again._

“ _Asshole,” I muttered._

_Making my way to the TV, I squatted down and grabbed the envelope from under the table. Hidden away because it was yellow Sam would've questioned it immediately._

_I stood back up and sat on the bed, ripping it open. Bobby said this was from Sara, and that she demanded this was given to me immediately. I had no idea how they knew each other, but if she contacted him to get to me, this had to have been important._

_The photos and letter were in my hands, and looking over them was torture. I kept rereading, flipping through everything. They stared back at me just the same. Demanding answers and attention._

_My eyes widened, letting a few tears stream down my cheeks. I wiped them away, feeling stupid that I let myself go over this._

_But now, I knew I had to get over there._

_Memorizing the return address on the envelope, I left everything on the bed, just taking my phone and leather jacket, and closed the door behind me. This motel was looking grim tonight, but there were still a few choices of cars to hotwire._

_Luckily, I picked the one with the door unlocked and keys still in the ignition._

_Sorry, buddy._

_The job conveniently took us here, around her. I was 30 minutes out, even before Bobby called and told me about her message._

_It seemed all the puzzles were fitting together._

_Starting it up and racing out of the parking lot, I had to restrain myself from recklessly driving. Normally, I wouldn't care, but I could barely see in front of me. Everything else was flashing before me; everything I left, couldn't stop. Everything was out to get me, as if the apocalypse wasn't going to take care of that._

_Finally, I pulled up in front of her house. It was small, but it suited her. Sara was unconventional._

_Squeezing the wheel with my hands wasn't releasing any nerves at all, so I gave up and got out of the car. I stuffed the keys in my pocket and hands in my jacket, walking up to her door. Anything to hide the anxiety I felt would be good._

_Instead of ringing the doorbell, I knocked. It was the middle of the night. The last thing I needed was..._ her _waking up and running into me._

_It only took two knocks for the knob to turn, and for Sara to appear._

_Hair short like mine now. But her, all of her, still beautiful, stunning, my breath catching in my throat._

_The moment of shock quickly died once her lips formed into a thin line. “What the hell?”_

“ _Exactly,” I agreed, my eyes settling on hers. Remembering I was mostly angry at her. “What the hell.”_

“ _You're not supposed to be here.”_

“ _Next time, don't leave a return address.”_

_She rolled her eyes and placed a hand on her hip. Fed up._

_That makes two of us._

“ _Whatever you have to say, I'm sure you can relay it to Bobby.”_

_Before she could slam the door in my face, I held my arm out, stopping it._

_Her hard stare softened. Any anger she had inside seemed to dissolve._

“ _You don't just send photos and a letter like that and expect me to be fine with it,” I gritted quietly. “That isn't a mail conversation. Now, tell me what the hell that was about.”_

_I expected an argument. Arguing was our downfall, cause neither of us wanted to be wrong. But this time, it was different._

_We were different. The world was different._

_She sighed, gathering herself before speaking, “Those seals can't be kept closed. I am expecting the worst. And if I'm right...then things need to be in order.”_

“ _And you expect me to come out of this alive?” I shot back, fingers pointing at my chest._

“ _Yes, I do,” she said, voice low. Arms crossed, eyes narrowed, like she wanted to shoot me point blank. “I do because you started all this with breaking the first seal. You should've stayed dead.”_

_Deep inside, I could feel something snap._

_But I didn't let it lose control, because I agreed._

“ _That can't be what this is about,” I said._

_The surprise on her face told me I was right._

_She took a deep breath and continued, “I brought Logan back.”_

“ _And now you have 10 years.”_

“ _He didn't deserve to die now.”_

“ _You are such a dumbass.”_

“ _He is my brother, Dean. You should know.”_

_Some crickets filled the air. Another car driving down the street. Silence wedging its way between._

_This is not what I expected my life to be._

“ _So, in any case, if something happens to me and Veronica makes it out-”_

“ _Veronica?” Her name wasn't mentioned in the letter._

_I could only think about the green eyes staring back at me in the photos._

“ _You have to take care of her. Until she is 18.”_

“ _Sara-”_

“ _This isn't a negotiation.”_

“ _What about your brother?”_

“ _He doesn't agree with this life. I tried asking him.”_

“ _Well, you can't just pass this off to me.”_

“ _Pass this off? YOU are the one who left. You don't get a say in anything. The least you could do is grow another dick, man up, and take responsibility. You owe us that much.”_

_I knitted my eyebrows but let that first part go. Now was probably not the time to crack jokes._

“ _Dean. I'm going to say this one more time. You will take care of her if anything happens to me. You will look after her and make sure she grows up in the best way possible. I don't want her to be a part of this life. And I know…I_ know _you wouldn't let anything happen to her. Just please, please do this for me. Save those pictures so you have something of her, if anything happens to you.”_

_Of her. My daughter. Veronica, my daughter. The one I never gave a chance._

_A tear rolled down from her eye. I knew Sara wanted this. She may not agree with it, but it's what she wanted._

“ _Sara,” I said, my voice cracking. I cleared my throat, covering my mouth with my hand before dragging it down and letting it drop. “I-I can't. Lisa and Ben...they-”_

“ _I knew I could never count on you."_

_That sentence stabbed me worse than anything else ever had._

“ _You are dead to me. Never come here again.”_

_Before I could say or do anything else, she slammed the door in my face._

 


End file.
